47: Week 13

 

This is the last picture taken of me and my dad, March 2022, the last time we were together. I've spent this past week thinking lots about him, talking to him, asking his advice about how to handle these unpredictable times, wondering what he would be thinking and saying. On Thursday evening, I lit a candle for his yahrzeit, stopping by it over the course of 24 hours as if visiting an old friend, looking for reassurance, seeking some guidance, wanting a steady hand to help me through the unsteady. My dad was never a big talker, often preferring to observe and take things in, but his smile, his eyes, his essence always said I am here. This past week, I counted on that presence. I imagine if he were here, he would tell me we'll get through this, and in many moments, I trust in that hope.

Yesterday, Nan and I headed downtown to the Colorado State Capitol for another "Hands Off" rally/march. Even though the crowd was not as large as two weeks ago, it was by no means small. Thousands gathered to show up for democracy, chanting shame and screaming loudly, proudly standing together against the regime. This time, we were able to arrive in time for the rally and speeches, and the speakers were aimed to bring together a wide range of coalitions that included a 20 year old activist, a doctor who'd spent time in Gaza sharing his perspective on the atrocities against Palestinians, and a trans woman passionately showing her courage in fighting decades of discrimination. During several of the speeches, I began to cry, heart heavy at all the injustices and hatred leveled at innocent people. We shouted the names of Jeanette Viguero and Mahmoud Khalil, raising our fists, refusing our silence. 

Today, I have time to dig in the dirt and continue to nourish the promises of spring, cook and share dinner with friends who have their own struggles simply getting through the days, and feel grateful for the love and joy of Nan and the pets. I hope you continue to find ways to nurture and bolster your courage in this long fight to combat hate and injustice. Keep raising your voice and resist.